Thelonius, the right-hand man of Lord Farquaad, responsible for torturing Farquaad's political enemies and one of the most mysterious characters of "Shrek". Ever wondered who is he? Well, we think know the answer. 

 

He didn't give up his job of an executor.  His sneaky pseudonym could have deceived many journalists, but for us is his identity clear. But for whom is Thelonius a.k.a Jihadi John working? According to en.wikipedia.org he beheads on behalf of a terrorist organization what proclaimed its own caliphate, namely the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria(ISIS). The leader of ISIS is caliph Abu Baqr al-Baghdadi. Can't you feel that something is fishy? How come did Thelonius become an islamic radical? His only creed is Lord Farquaad. Everything will become clear for us, if we realize that on wikipedia the name of the leader of ISIS was misspellt, his name is not Abu Baqr al-Baghdadi, but Abu Baqr al-Farquaadi. BAM! Now you know the truth: Lord Farquaad undercover is the one behind the whole ISIS thing. But that's not all, look at this map.

The red area is controlled by ISIS, the area covered by green stripes is a SWAMP. ISIS controlled by Farquaad wants to exterminate all ogres inhabiting the Iraqi swamp. Brogres, now you know the truth, spread it. And for the victims of al-Farquaadi- remember, Shrek is with you, Shrek is love, Shrek is life./pyton